Roles

Well, it’s been a long time since my last post. A very long time…

So much has happened, and so much of it I wanted to share, but life just got too fast paced, too busy, too crazy, and I couldn’t get to it. But now I’m in the process of reconnecting with the things that are truly important in my life. And writing is one of the those things.

Recently, a new friend read my (very few) blog posts and his comments reminded me of how much I missed writing.

Today I want to talk about “roles” – a theme I’ve been thinking about a lot for the last several weeks.

This may sound repetitive to some, but new information to others. And it’s a very strong theme in my life right now.

So, we all have several roles in life, right? We are wives, husbands, moms, dads, teachers, managers, officers, sisters, brothers, sons and daughters. What we are is a sum of all these roles, plus something (a lot) more profound. I guess there’s nothing wrong with having roles. They may give us purpose and remind us of our obligations. The problem arises when we identify with those roles, meaning, we think we ARE that. We may go around bragging about being a MOM or an ACCOUNT EXECUTIVE or a TEACHER or a DAD or what-have-you. By our own doing, that thing becomes our identity, to the point that we wouldn’t recognize ourselves outside of that role.

Then, what happens when, God forbid, that’s taken away from us? If we identify with that role so profoundly, when that is gone, what’s left?

I read an article once about a man who committed suicide because he lost all his money in Bernard Madoff’s Ponzi scheme. That really left an impression on me as someone who was so identified with the role of “investor” or “wealthy” that, once that was taken away from him, he had no reason to exist.

I work in corporate and I always observe these things… I guess you can notice that everywhere, but it seems to be so strong in the corporate world. I am the CEO. I am the President. I am the VP of this or that or something else… and I, of course, am not immune to that. I catch myself sometimes getting “territorial” about my roles and claiming rights based on them, and looking for a sense of self worth based on those roles.

That’s where the yoga philosophy steps in to remind me: I am not my title.  I am not my salary. I am not my house. I am not my bank account. I am not my belongings. I am not what people perceive me to be. I am not my body. I am not my outfits. I am not even my intelligence or my skills. I am definitely not my thoughts or my feelings (those are so misleading!). I am so much more that that. We all are so much more that that.

Once all that is stripped off, we are still us, creatures of God, worthy of love, connected to the source. As important as those roles may be, why would anyone want to limit themselves to them? What’s that in us that fear being bigger, more expansive, more fluid, a part of the whole?

That exploration never ends… I am (as I hope you are) always looking for paths which will lead me back to myself, to my essence, to who I REALLY AM once all the layers are pilled away, once all the makeup is washed away, once all the pretense wears off… we are part of divine creation, therefore divine in our own right. We come from love, so we ARE love. Believe it!

“All my instincts/ They return/ And the grand façade/ So soon will burn/ Without a noise/ Without my pride/ I reach out from the inside”